Thought it might be something amusing to put up and see what happens.
Starting a (vaguely?) chronological timeline of events in history. But not just any history. A screwed up, misinterpreted, bastardized, gutted, and finally revamped version of history.
Starting... with the invention of the wheel around 10000 BC.
the invention of the wheel was highly controversial, most folk were very unhappy with the project as it really wasn't as efficient as promised at extinguishing used cooking fires and most people couldn't understand the need to do so in the first place.
9999 BC
Posted By: Gavalinb on
07/05/07 at 09:18 AM
First pizza delivery business opens. Wheel also makes handy table for pie dough.
9900 BC
Posted By: Zeta Thompson on
07/21/07 at 01:11 AM
Ook the Mad placed large rats on the wheel and started the wheel rolling. He invented hash, then he placed the rats on the wheel and they made them run. Now he had the first exercise machine. He spent the rest of his days chasing the wheel all over the savannah.
9900 BC
Posted By: Drey on
08/21/07 at 12:37 PM
Rats stage first of several failed uprisings against Ook.
Posted By: Zeta Thompson on
09/12/07 at 12:36 AM
Ook's wife runs after Ook. She stops long enough on a plateau to stand on a log and announce it is a platform. She is then in the highest position in the land and declares an end to rat race and the dawn of new era with her five year plan. She is discreditied because she will not define a year and dies still known only as ook's wife.
Posted By: Ssolvarain on
10/04/07 at 04:30 PM
The magical kingdom of Zeal rises.
The people rejoice, as they can now stop using outdated vacuum tube technology and use the arcanet to communicate and play counter strike with one another.
9800 BC
Posted By: Zeta Thompson on
01/07/08 at 03:07 AM
The kingdom of Zeal falls when those counting strikes realize baseball has not yet been invented. THey run out to do so, but instead come up with an odd game involving a wicker man and a flaming ball. The first witch hunts are on.
Posted By: Ssolvarain on
01/23/08 at 09:58 AM
In order to better allow his followers to enjoy the witch hunts, God invents hard liquor and beer. This has the side effect of preventing the Irish from dominating the competitive sport of who can kill the most people from another country.
THey have some Gaul
Posted By: Zeta Thompson on
07/09/08 at 01:06 AM
Not wishing to be outdone, the resodents of a section of what would later be known as Europe surrender to everyone who enters their encampments. They spend their time taking the fermented wine and boiling it to give them a good excuse. BRandy is created and then shipped to the Goths along with lots of black eye makeup.
